Two months ago during a breathwork experience I was working on healing my relationship with the Divine Masculine. Me and the Divine Feminine have been deepening our relationship for some time, but I have kept the Masculine at arms length. As I was breathing and lifting off into my intentions I asked Spirit to show me an ancestor from my lineage that could teach me about standing with the Masculine in a good way, a healed way. I looked back 100 years, 200, 300, 500, I went back 1,000 years in my lineage and found no one who would step forward. And then a voice from Spirit whispered in my ear, “You are the first in your line to do this. You are the cycle breaker. You already are the healed form of the Divine Masculine.”
Okay, wow. Such direct messages are impossible to ignore, right? That should be an honor to receive such sacred clarity! Well, at that moment I did not feel blessed or encouraged by this message. I felt fucking pissed off. I was so angry with the 1,000’s of men who have come before me in my lineage and ignored this calling. I felt burdened with the weight of the responsibility. I yelled back at Spirit that I didn’t want this, nor did I ask for it. Cycle breakers never ask for it and it is never an easy path to walk. And it is an honorable path to walk. It is the path of the sacred destroyer. The dismantler of structure. It is a primal force that can change entire landscapes.
However, it is when the Divine Masculine and Divine Feminine work in harmony together that being a cycle breaker gets really juicy. Working with the Divine Feminine allows us to dismantle systems while loving the members of it. Working in harmony gives us the power to destroy and the permission to embrace and heal. I see all of this working through me. The only way out is through, so it is through the tears of my anger that I have learned the true strength in what it means to be a soft-strong man. I am a soft-strong man. I am fallible, engaged in a vulnerable dance with masculine and feminine that makes many people uncomfortable. When asked to conform I re-form. When told to believe I question. When the right way or the only way is suggested I call bullshit. And I do that all with the love of the Parent and the full support of Spirit. I am the cycle breaker for my lineage, and Love is my secret weapon.